Chapter 5, Dudley

Haiiiiiii guys - sorry for the wait.

ilyVm.

4) Dudley Der had requested I never write about his friends - specifically his friends in this club. Let's call this little boy’s club "AA" - seeing that's what these boys so aptly named all of their group chats.

When Sharpe brought up Dudley's request, it surprised me - this was the first time I was hearing it. Supposedly, Dudley had asked Ross to pass this request along - Dudley had never asked this of me directly.

Dudley had always been an advocate of denv.her. and never seemed to put much weight on it. He had voiced numerous times that anyone who had a problem with the blog was dumb because at the end of the day, & I quote "no offense, it's just a stupid blog". 

& no offense was taken. I appreciated Dudley's honesty. It was a man's response. Because seriously, what middle aged MAN would concern themselves with a fashion & lifestyle blog?? A man wouldn't. So I took Dudley's "stupid blog" response as his truth - that was a mistake. 

Before Dud had brought Ross into AA, an AA member had spoken up about being V concerned about Ross' potential membership because of the blog. 

The blog could expose. 

The blog was a threat. 

And, what if, JUST WHAT IF, they brought Ross into AA, and I began to write about it's members?

LOL. PSYCH. 

It was at this time, a tenured business man & AA mentor spoke up - If you all would really veto someone's membership, due to social media use of a significant other, then this is not a business club at all. 

Dudley vigorously agreed with this mentor - as did the majority of AA's members. Fast forward a couple of weeks, & Ross had been requested to join AA.

SO, here I was at this HH, with Sharpe telling me that Dudley requested I not write about his friends in AA. & it just seemed  

Because Dudley had verbatim told me that denv.her. was stupid.

Sharpe went into detail how Dudley felt responsible for bringing Ross and I around - then, I had wrote about Faye, an AA member's girlfriend - so Dudley's request had gone unheeded. Dud was V pupset about all of this & therefore, contributed heavily to the verbal onslaught against Ross and I at the event.

#youneedtocalmdown #yourebeingtooloud

It was in this moment that I started realizing the clout these people were putting on denv.her. 

These people didn't think the blog was stupid...these people didn't think the blog was stupid at all.

They were putting weight on it.

& a lot of it.

Which quite frankly, is hysterical. 

Readers, these boys want to be business men. 

These boys want to be politicians. 

& yet here they are, worried about a freaking small time blog.

It's laughable.

If any of these boys EVER manage to transcend their parent's shadows and make something of themselves, they're going to be sh*tting their pants when the actual media gets a hold of them. 

Hell, I've been written about negatively numerous times because of this blog, & do you think I give two sh*ts? No. You wanna know why? Because who gives a f*ck about someone who doesn't like you writing poorly about you.

& what's even more, the writers who targeted me, were warranted in their feelings.

Let me repeat, slower now, for the more irrational individuals in the back.

The writers who targeted me, were warranted in their feelings. 

I had done something to upset these writers, and they subsequently wrote about it. Big whoop. Who cares. I read the negative posts about me, took them with a grain of salt, & went on my way. The members of AA seemingly lack the maturity to do the same.

I apologized to Sharpe (MF'ing again lol) about not heeding Dudley's request (that I never even knew had been made) - surely if Dudley would have made his request face to face, I would have honored his wishes.

That wrapped up our happy hour.

That night, I went home emotionally drained. 

Getting through that happy hour was excruciating. I had never tried to rebuild a friendship before...and it left me feeling empty. 

The apologies I had given were hollow. I didn't believe the words. But I wanted my friends back more than my pride and more than my beliefs at that moment in time.

I woke up in the middle of the night that night & started crying. Ross held me and told me it all was going to be ok.

To Be Continued