AND I’m back!! So where were we? Ahhh that’s right, the bachelorette party.

So the second morning we are in Vegas, we all wake up viciously hungover (because how else do you ever wake up in Sin City?). We had met a fabulous group of Brits the day prior and they had invited us to their table at Wet Republic. Guess what that meant?! There was no need to get up early and go meet a club promoter. This way we all would get an extra 2 hours of sleep that were MUCH needed. I woke up and let the girls know I would like to go into Wet Republic with our British friends so we could sleep longer. Logical thinking correct? Well in this instance, I learned that not everyone has the capacity to think logically lol. One of my bridesmaids was “friends” with a Wet Republic promoter and if we didn’t use him to get into the club, in her mind, it was apparently Armageddon.

AAAND cue the screaming:

“HE’S MY FRIEND!!! I AM NOT GOING TO BE YOUR FRIEND ANYMORE IF WE DON’T USE THIS PROMOTER!! HE’S MY FRIEND! I WILL NOT BE YOUR FRIEND ANYMORE IF YOU DO THIS! HE’S MY FRIIIEEND!!!”

Wait… so is he your friend? LOL. You guys, this girl, we’ll call her The Screamer, was literally SCREAMING at me for 10 straight minutes for making a logical decision and it was my bachelorette party. If you can even remotely imagine this scenario you’re probably laughing. You know I am. This is hands down one of the weirdest things I’ve ever witnessed in my life thus far.

I was sitting in bed, smiling, watching this girl throw this EPIC tantrum pondering how on earth someone in their mid 20’s could be so utterly detached from reality.

So guess what I did? I bit my tongue, got out of bed, agreed to use her promoter and got ready. You know why? Because I’m 25 f**king years old. Even remotely engaging with someone who’s having a total melt down over a Vegas promoter is totally pointless. You can’t get blood from a stone, AKA, you can’t argue with crazy. This is the moment when I realized I needed to figure out how to kick someone out of my wedding.

So we get to Wet Republic, use The Screamer’s promoter, & we end up standing around till our British friends get there. Surprise surprise lol. We then continue to have an absolute blast.

By the time we got back to the hotel, one of the girls was making bizarre threats and crying about her long lost ex-boyfriend.

Would it actually be a trip to Vegas without someone crying? I think I may just be going with the wrong people (yes I know, I am working on being a better judge of character lol). Anyways this girl is bawling hysterically and any other trip I would have been more sympathetic but at a Bachelorette Party? Your friend is celebrating getting to marry the love of her life and you’re seriously going to aggressively boohoo over your ex? Not the best time and place; BUT when you see a friend crying, you comfort them. Or attempt to.

Comforting was more or less shot down because this girl’s break up is “worse” than anyone else’s… ever. Worse than when Ross and Rachel were on a break. Worse than all of Taylor Swift's breakups combined (that's a sh*t ton). Even worse than Romeo and Juliet’s overall situation…and they both died. You win the worst break up ever award!

Jk lol. Everyone goes through bad breakups; put some gangtsa rap on and deal with it. It was pretty clear there was going to be no “come to Jesus moment” that life goes on after a breakup; so we went on with our night.

The next afternoon, we were back in Denver and after three days of aggressively chugging Gatorade, I finally felt like a human again (what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, except for the hangover). Is it just me or are hangovers like a 3-4 day ordeal now? Partying is hard.

TO BE CONTINUED

Wedding Woes: Will you not be my Bridesmaid? Part 2